My first experience with night terrors was at the young age of ten. I remember coming home from a long day of playing at the pool. There’s definitely something to be said about being in the water all day with the sun beating down; it always drained the energy right from me. I recall going into my bedroom, hearing the humming from the window air conditioner, and relaxing in the coolness of the room. In short, I was falling asleep faster than I could even change clothes.
At first, I thought it was a dream, but I could feel my pillow being pulled slowly from beneath my head as well as hear my family in the background talking from another room. Who was pulling my pillow? I couldn’t even move to turn around! That’s when it started and when I heard it: the buzzing sound. This sound was like nothing that I could compare to anything other than those pesky bugs, locusts, that come every few years and leave such damage in their wake. Locusts are the absolute worse with their shedding skins and eerie sounds. No matter how hard I tried, I could not wake from that strange grip.
I could still hear everything around me but wasn’t able to move a muscle. It was scary, to say the least, and I remember thinking that maybe I’d had a seizure of some kind because I also felt pressure in my head. Nonetheless, it didn’t feel normal, so I never said anything about it to anyone.
After dealing with this for several years, I learned that the more I feared it, the worse it became. There was always a sense of doom and dread as I experienced these waking nightmares. I was convinced that someone or something was in the room with me, sent there to do harm. I also dealt with regular nightmares as well, you know, the kind where you’re being chased till you finally wake up in utter fear.
Although tired of dealing with these episodes, I thought I would always be cursed, if you will, with this affliction that I felt I must have brought on myself somehow. Maybe it was from that time spent playing with a friend’s ouija board or maybe from reading a scary novel that I was told not to read.
Finally, I think I just snapped and decided to fight back. I remember running in my dream—it was a regular nightmare not sleep paralysis—and I could feel the warm breath of this hideous monster breathing on my neck. “It’s too close,” I thought to myself. “What will it do to me if it catches me?” At that moment, an overwhelming sense of bravery took over and in that split second, I decided to face this nemesis that had been chasing me for so long. I turned around to look at it, and all of a sudden, I found myself in a toy store with my mom, buying a new bike.
Confused, I glanced around, breathing hard, trying to figure out how I got there. I also remember thinking that whatever had just happened was pretty cool. This was the first lucid dream that I changed by making the conscious decision to turn around. Later on, I learned that I could change my dreams by practicing waking up in my dream if you will. Once I learned to do this, an entire new world opened up to me.
Today, you only see bits and pieces of dream lucidity in movies and songs. I decided to read up on other people’s experiences and write a book about it. The story in the book is fiction but is very accurate in its context. I’m currently working on book two of this trilogy, but the possibilities are endless because well, so are dreams. My book Envisage: In Through The Mirror is available through Amazon.
My name is Debbie Oliver, but I use my nickname Ollie for the books. I have many interests. My love of music spans from rock to Irish and ambient, which I use a lot when I write. Laughing and being around people that are upbeat and have a sense of humor is awesome. Life is good; never stop believing in your dreams. To me, this is more of a journal and a kind of therapy rather than trying to sell a book. I feel like everyone has some sort of story to tell; they just have to tap into what interests them the most.
If there is anything you would like to share your experiences with lucid dreaming with me, my email address is firstname.lastname@example.org. You can also leave your comments below.
Amazon Link: Envisage: In Through the Mirror
Recommended Article: Envisage, Night Terrors, and Dream Lucidity – Guest Post by Debbie Oliver